Happiness Hotel

[Dr Teeth Fangirl]

This is a fanfic I wrote where the cast of another Muppet movie re-enacted the song 'Happiness Hotel' from 'The Great Muppet Movie'. This has DKC characters from the game and then some OCs. Now let me please note that eveyrone in my little world is humanized('cept for Enguarde), Cranky and Wrinkly look younger than they're s'posed to, and Cranky has no beard or cane(s).

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<DK, Blue, and Funky walk up to a counter where a man with dark gray hair is sitting, asleep.>

DK: 'Cuse me.

<The man, who just so happens to be Cranky, wakes up and stares at him.>

Cranky: Wha...?

DK: We'd like a room.

<Cranky's eyes widen.>

Cranky: ...Really?

DK: ...Yeah, we'd like to check in.

<Cranky grins.>

Cranky: Somebody's checkin' in!

<A bell rings, several doors open from the floor above, and their inhabitants stick their heads and/or upper torsos out.>

Inhabitants: Somedody's checkin' in?

<Someone starts playing a banjo as Cranky, the desk clerk, turns back to the three.>

Desk clerk

There's no fire in the Fireplace No carpet on the Floor Don't even try to order Dinner There's no kitchen Now But if the road's been Bumpy And you need to rest a bit

Desk clerk and inhabitants

Then welcome home, to Happiness Hotel!

Cranky: Hey, how're you guys fixin' to pay?

DK: Well, what're our options?

Cranky: A) credit card, B) cash, or C) sneak out in the middle of the night.

<Silence.>

Blue: We'll take C.

Cranky: Very popular choice.

Shocking Mischief's road manager

If you've got Luggage, Then you better keep it Handy But you're runnin' outta Luck The bellhops'll keep you Oraganized But the elevator's stuck

Lead bellhop(Sero)

So if don't find friendly Animals But you can stand the smell

Desk clerk, bellhops, and inhabitants

Then welcome home, to Happiness Hotel! Welcome home! (Welcome Home) Welcome Home! Welcome Home Don't matter where you come From You won't never do us wrong

Shocking Mischief's bass player

OK, well now welcome and Shabby But it's at your own expense!

Shocking Mischeif's keyboardist(OK, Cranky's the desk clerk so that means this is Wrinkly!)

And the whole d**n thing Has been Condemned By American Express!

Shocking Mischief's lead guitarist

Well the men may all seem cheerful And we live on a jacked-up hill

Shocking Mischief and their road manager

Well welcome home, to Happiness Hotel!

DK: (to Diddy)Hey, you guys live here?

Diddy: Oh, yeah, but only between gigs. So that means we've been here, what, now?

Wrinkly: Probably five years.

Dixie: Yeah but things are really gonna change when we get more gigs!

DK: (notices something's up with Azlamec)Hey, what's wrong with the drummer?

Tiny: Oh, he's just upset because of the entire mess here.

Other Kong pianist

There are bugs (There are bugs) And there are lice (There are lice)

Shocking Mischief's road manager

We may all have Problems But you'll never beat the price!

The bear

You've got every kinda critter!

Shocking Mischief's road manager

You've got every kinda pest!

Desk clerk

But we read 'em All

Just like any other guest

Desk clerk, bellhops, Shocking Mischief, and inhabitants

We read every Other But as far as we can Tell, You'll fit right in to Happiness Hotel!

The bear and the main Kong

We'll fit right in!

Everyone

To Happiness Hotel!